Year-end reflections from a former dissertator

It’s that time of year. You know what time I mean: The time when desperate dissertators swill coffee, scarf down holiday cookies, and hunker over their computers, trying to write as much as they can on their dissertation proposals or manuscripts before it’s time to go back to work.

Are you in a reflective mood? Maybe you feel pensive, a little melancholy, about the progress you’ve made this year. Maybe you feel chipper and optimistic about the great things to come. The end of the year is a fitting time to reflect on progress made in our scholarly endeavors and set our intentions for the future. I’m doing a little reflecting myself as we welcome in a new year.

A time to reflect on our scholarly progress

Are you making progress on the milestones in your Ph.D. program? It can be slow-going, I know. During most of the eight years of graduate school, I taught at a career college. Monday through Thursday, I taught morning classes, drove home for lunch, and drove back to campus for night classes. Fridays were for grading and prepping. I spent the rest of the weekend writing.

Faculty and students had a week off during the summer and a week for the winter holidays. Often we worked on Christmas Eve, right up to 10:20 p.m.

With such a haphazard writing schedule, I struggled to finish my dissertation proposal. Sometimes I felt I was making progress; other times, I felt I was writing in circles. Each time I uploaded my latest debacle to the course room, I would have a couple weeks to pick up the pieces of the rest of my life while I waited for my Chair to rip my paper to shreds.

Gradually, I morphed from student to scholar. After eight long, painful years, I defended the dissertation and earned the Ph.D. In the process, I learned how to write a lot.

Now, six years later, my writing projects are different but my goals are similar. I still have a lot to do. However, without the structure and discipline of a Ph.D. program, I have to rely on myself for motivation.

Reflecting on the past year, I feel as though I’ve been busy. What was I working on all year? I’m sure I did something! New Year’s Eve is a good time to stop and write a list.

I published the second book in the Desperate Dissertator Series. Aligning the Elements, seems to be finding a following. I guess I’m not the only one confounded by this challenging topic.
The article about rich pictures I published with The Qualitative Report at the end of 2018 has had 434 downloads this year. People like anything with pictures.
I published two articles (rants, really) with Medium on my favorite topic of for-profit higher education.
I made time for nonscholarly writing as well. I wrote a novel and finished a memoir, both of which I hope to publish in 2020.
I dusted off my teaching persona. I taught business classes to artists to help them bring their art into the world.

A time to set intentions for the future

Speaking of hope, now is the time to set our intentions for the future. I resist this endeavor mightily. In the past, my intentions have rarely been fulfilled. Yipes, look how I just used passive voice to describe my failure, as if I had nothing to do with it, as if some external force has repeatedly failed to “fulfill” my intentions. That bit of writing points out the vagueness of passive voice, as well as the problem with my goal-setting.

I think my intentions evaporated by February every year for three reasons: my goals were too broad, I wanted to be perfect, and I let my thoughts and feelings get in my way.

My goals were too broad

I failed to identify specific actions I could take to achieve my goals. Now, instead of setting an intention to “write a journal article,” I break the goal into small actions and I put them on my calendar. To write a journal article is my overarching objective, but to achieve the objective, I define the steps I need to take to get there:

research journals
choose one journal
identify the journal guidelines
write my research questions
write an outline of the article
gather current research
prepare the list of references
identify data sources
conduct the analysis
write up the results
write the discussion
write the introduction
submit to the journal

I wanted to be perfect

I fell into the trap of perfectionism. Of course, we all want what we write to be perfect the moment it flows from our brain to the page. If only! Even on a good day (when I’m well-rested, alert, and enthusiastic about writing), I rarely get it right. Human endeavors are fraught with imperfections. I’m not exempt.

During the past year, I accepted the fact that perfection is unattainable. I stopped obsessing over every little thing and focused on getting things done. It worked!

If you find yourself repeatedly editing the same assignment, or not writing at all, stop for a moment and do an internal check to see if a desire for perfection might be part of the cause. Nobody expects dissertators to be perfect. Some Chairs and universities set stringent guidelines, rules, and expectations, which we do our best to meet. However, the truth is, the dissertation is the beginning of our research careers, not the culmination. Since I graduated, I’ve learned a lot about writing, editing, and conducting research. You will, too. In the meantime, it doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be done.

I let thoughts and feelings hinder my progress

Like most humans, I have thoughts and feelings about many things. This past year, I have been honing the idea that my thoughts and feelings are superfluous to accomplishing my goals. Don’t get me wrong: I don’t think it’s possible for us to suppress all thoughts and feelings, nor do I suggest we try. However, sometimes I let my thoughts and feelings hinder my ability and willingness to take action. Therein lies my downfall.

Do you get trapped in negative thoughts? Do you let your feelings overwhelm you? I have come to believe it doesn’t really matter what we think and feel. The Universe doesn’t respond to our thoughts and feelings. It only responds to what we do. Our actions move us closer to our goals.

It seems like a no-brainer, I know. I’m a slow learner. I’m also a moper and a complainer. Unfortunately, not much gets done when I mope or complain. I can waste a lot of time complaining: not enough time, not enough money, no one understands, oh woe is me.

This past year, I’ve been experimenting with a new approach. I write out my thoughts and feelings about my project before I sit down to work. I do my whining and ranting on paper. Then I set it aside and get busy. When thoughts and feelings interrupt me (e.g., this will never work, this is stupid, I’m such a terrible writer, I’m hungry, where’s my cat), I drop them into my mental “do later” bucket and carry on with my work. I won’t say I’m always successful. Sometimes I have to take a nap. However, this past year, I’ve accomplished much more than I thought I would. That’s progress.

My hope for you

I hope you find some good writing time this winter. If not, I hope you make some time to write, good or not. Writing a few paragraphs is better than writing zero paragraphs. Put your writing time on your calendar. Make a date with yourself. Remember, it doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be done. The world needs your contribution. Please don’t give up.

I wish you all the best for a happy, healthy, productive new year.

Sources

Booton, C. M. (2018). Using rich pictures to verify, contradict, or enhance verbal data. The Qualitative Report, 23(11), 2835-2849. Retrieved from https://nsuworks.nova.edu/tqr/vol23/iss11/13

Booton, C. M. (2019). Aligning the elements [Desperate Dissertator Series, No. 2]. Portland, OR: Crossline Press. ISBN 978-1099364761.

Booton, C. M. (2019, July 5). R.I.P. Gainful employment rule. Medium. https://medium.com/@carolbooton/r-i-p-gainful-employment-rule-11115f38f33f

Booton, C. M. (2019, March 16). Friends don’t let friends enroll at for-profit colleges. Medium. https://medium.com/@carolbooton/friends-dont-let-friends-enroll-at-for-profit-colleges-4445a70ca12b

December 11, 2019December 11, 2019

Hey dissertators, take a break to enjoy the season

Take a break from the holiday madness to breathe, reflect, and regroup. Here is a selection of Love Your Dissertation blogposts to motivate you to get your proposal or manuscript to the next milestone so you can earn your Ph.D. and get on with your career.

Feel like you can’t? Get busy and get it done

Ask my mother, I bet she will say I was born moaning “I can’t!” Rarely is the problem as simple as I don’t know how. I get paralyzed by my fear that I will fail. Here’s what to do when you are struck with a case of the “I can’ts” as you are struggling to get your dissertation proposal approved. [July 2017] Read more

Should we finish everything we start?

When I was a teenager, I would start sewing a garment, make a total mess of it, realize the endeavor was hopeless, and consign the pile of abused fabric to the trash in disgust. What might I have learned from the debacle if I had kept working at it, seeking creative ways to turn my mistakes into something useful? [September 2018] Read more

Perfection is the enemy of the good enough

Have heard your dissertation chair say, “Good is the enemy of the best,” and taken that as an exhortation to settle for nothing less than perfection? Sometimes I thought I wrote something that was perfect, but even a few hours later, I discovered typos, grammar errors, and faulty reasoning. Maybe it is time to let go of our obsession with perfection and focus on doing our best. [October 2019] Read more

Perfection is not required, but persistence is essential. Take a break from the writing. I hope you get as much writing done as you can stand while still enjoying a peaceful holiday season with family, old friends, and new friends.

Life is more than a Ph.D., my dissertator friends. I hope you take time now to be present to the magic in the moment. Don’t look back later with regret that you missed opportunities to be with loved ones. We never know when they may be gone.

September 24, 2018

Should we finish everything we start?

When I was a teenager, I would start sewing a garment, make a total mess of it, realize the endeavor was hopeless, and consign the pile of abused fabric to the trash in disgust. What might I have learned, what might have I created from the debacle if I had kept working at it, seeking creative ways to turn my mistakes into something useful? Back in the 1970s, fashion trends being that they were, if nothing else, I could have made several pairs of hot pants.

I can think of some things that are obviously best abandoned as soon as possible. For example, consuming a big plate of peas—I don’t care that much for peas. (I recommend dropping them under the table for the cat—that worked when I was a kid), or walking two miles if my bladder starts to tingle at mile 1 (I never argue with my bladder). Life does not have to be a torturous slog unless I want it to be, not if I was lucky enough to be born in this place and time. Misery is optional.

Now that I’m old(er), I recognize that some battles aren’t worth fighting. For example, jobs that didn’t suit me, relationships that weren’t working… I don’t like to admit defeat, but I’ve learned sometimes it is best to call it a day. Twisting myself into a pretzel to maintain a job or relationship might give me a sense of grim accomplishment in the short term; however, in the long term, I will regret the time I spent trying to save something that wasn’t worth saving. In other words, fish or cut bait. Have you heard that expression? I’ve only been fishing once, and it was not a successful or gratifying experience, but I like the idea behind the metaphor. Either do it, that thing I am whining about, or give it up and move on.

Some big dreams are hard to abandon, even when pursuing them seems to drag me further into disappointment—for example, my elusive art “career.” When I was young and naïve, some friends I trusted told me painting was dead. Around that same time, my parents warned me I’d better learn how to type if I wanted to support myself. I believed them.

In contrast, some dreams I wish I had jettisoned when there was still time to take another path—I’m thinking of my pursuit of a doctorate. Where were my friends and family then? They encouraged and supported my dream. You can do it, they said, and I believed them. If I had spent the last forty years working on my art instead of bouncing from job to job, school to school, I wonder where I’d be now.

On the other hand, persisting in the face of obstacles can be character-building. Maybe I wish I hadn’t spent eight years and $50,000 on a doctorate, but the dogged determination I developed along the way serves me daily as I work to create my next adventure. What can we learn by not giving up too soon?

I wish we had a way to tell the future, so we could know if it was time to persist or time to pivot. If you have an Magic 8 ball that gives you more than “Future cloudy, try again later,” lucky you, and where can I get one?

Every day we get the choice: continue toward that dream or pivot toward a new one. As long as we are pursuing something that interests us, does it really matter what dream we attain? Does the destination matter? Maybe we are only fully alive when we are on the journey.

Do you have a dream waiting for your attention? Is it time to finish that doctorate? Or is it time to pivot to a new dream?

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Applying Theory

Dissertators often struggle to choose and apply a theoretical framework to their research projects. In this helpful guide, I offer suggestions from my own experience. In addition, I reveal how other dissertators have applied theory successfully and earned their doctorates.

Written in a friendly, nonscholarly manner, I demystify the challenges of applying academic theory to a research project. You will learn that theory is nothing to fear—in fact, we all use theory all the time! With the help of this powerful little book, you will learn to master theory and achieve your dream of earning your Ph.D.

Print version $15.99
Kindle version $7.99

Resubmit! 28 ½ Reasons Why You Can’t Get Your Dissertation Proposal Approved

This comprehensive book is the missing link for dissertators who have struggled to get their proposals approved. This indispensable book bulges with insights, suggestions, examples, diagrams, and practical tips, written especially for the online dissertator who may receive little support during the proposal process.

I present solutions to address twenty-eight potential reasons why you might be struggling to get your proposal approved. For example, you will learn how to write a clear problem statement, devise research questions and hypotheses, and align the elements of the proposal to facilitate speedy approval. I unlock the mysteries of Word and Excel to show you specifically how to use these tools for your proposals. Over 200 tables and figures show you exactly what to do. As a bonus, you will learn how to design a web-based survey and make a plan for fielding and analyzing the data. In this book, I cover it all to help you overcome obstacles and finish your dissertation.

Free templates and worksheets are available here.

Print version $29.99
Kindle version $9.99